When you meet someone you like online and you’re making plans to actually hang out, texting is basically a foregone conclusion given that it’s the main way we all communicate.
However, if you haven’t even met the guy yet and he’s been blowing up your iPhone, you need to nip it in the bud.
Here’s why texting too much before a first date is your biggest mistake.
It’s way too familiar: You have endless chats over text with your BFF about the latest episode of HTGAWM. It’s just plain weird to text day and night with a guy you haven’t even gone on a first date with yet. Unfortunately, you think you’re bonding with this person and getting to know them… but you don’t know them yet. They’re still a complete stranger to you. Keep it that way and then meet them in person and decide how you feel.
You run out of things to say: If you’re texting your boyfriend when you’re both at work during the week to stay in touch, that makes sense and is totally cool. But if you’re texting someone before the first date, you will 100 percent run out of things to say on your in-person date. And that’s a recipe for disaster, as anyone who’s been on an awkward first date knows all too well.
He might get obsessive: I had a recent experience where a guy texted me day and night for several days before we actually met up for a drink. I tried to answer just enough to be polite because I was still interested in meeting him, but by the time the evening arrived, he was acting like I was already his girlfriend. He seemed upset and surprised when I didn’t feel we had enough chemistry to go out again and I actually had to block his number because he wouldn’t stop texting me. Next time I’ll save the texting for after it’s obvious we’re going on a second date.
Any connection you feel is totally false: Online dating is super tricky. You’re trying to figure out whether someone is the right one for you based on a handful of photos, descriptive paragraphs, likes and dislikes, and messages. No wonder you get a headache every so often and take a break from dating. It’s easy to feel connected to a guy when you’re having a seemingly amazing conversation over your iPhones. After all, we’re millennials and used to talking to someone this way. But you might not feel the same connection in person which is all that really matters.them in return!
A bit about your days: Sure, you don’t need to tell him that you got a grilled cheese sandwich for lunch or that your computer shut down on its own — that’s boring and he probably won’t care. However, sharing anything interesting or different that happened in your day is another way to keep the conversation between you alive and moving forward until you meet up for your first date.
